How to say no, chapter 4

My purpose in jotting down these notes is not to post "the answer" so that people don't have to buy the book: on the contrary, I hope anyone struggling with persistent sin will buy the book. There is so much more there that is so rich. Rather, this is just an exercise for me to review what I have read and studied.

Continuing on with my notes from How To Say No to a Stubborn Habit by Erwin Lutzer:

Chapter 4: Getting God's Perspective

"One reason why...people reverted back to their old behavior patterns is they misunderstood the full extent of their problem. True, they wanted victory, but they didn't understand how or why God would bring it about. They, like most of us, wanted to overcome a specific habit -- for their own benefit. They wanted to be free of the symptoms of their problem, but did not want a thorough examination that would reveal deeper problems in their lives which they were unwilling to face. The habits themselves were like the tip of the iceberg."

"Sinful habits are usually indicative of unresolved conflicts. we must always seek underlying causes rather than treating the symptoms. God uses our struggle with sin to diagnose our true condition. Temptation is His X-ray machine, discovering the hidden conflicts that need attention."

"The deeper issue we often avoid is our rebellion against God."

"To confess your sins means that you agree with God that you have sinned: it also means that you agree that the sin must be forsaken. Those who confess their sins, intending to repeat the same actions, are only partially repentant. Such incomplete repentance leads to a downward spiral of repeated failure. Confession means that you admit your sin and give God permission to remove it from your life. Of course, I am not saying that you will never commit the same sin again -- if so. none of us could claim forgiveness. But their needs to be a willingness to part with the sin, and a submission to God's verdict on the matter. Apart from such acknowledgment, your intentions are self-centered. You are inquiring how forgiveness will benefit you instead of considering how you have offended God."

"Temptation...gives you a clear-cut opportunity to declare your allegiance to Jesus Christ."

Lutzer suggests taking time to do an inventory of our lives, jotting down areas that need work, defining our attitudes, identifying what's really going on in our hearts. Then give ourselves and our problems over to Him, letting go of our perceived "rights." We have to realize that our ultimate goal is not just victory over sin, but coming to know and love God will all our hearts, soul, mind and strength..

It's a stunning thought to me that every time I choose my way instead of God, I am not loving Him with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength.

How to say no, chapter 3

Continuing on with my notes from How To Say No to a Stubborn Habit by Erwin Lutzer:

Chapter 3: Putting You Past Behind You

"The sin that troubles you today sank its roots into your life yesterday. You can't break your sinful habits until you have a new beginning."

Satan likes to use illegitimate guilt to make us feel that a new beginning is impossible. Or he wants us to think that "we've gone too far...since the past can't be reclaimed we might as well give up." Plus sinful habits have a "domino effect," making them easier to commit the next time. Once guard has been let down it is easy to let it down again.

True, actions have consequences that sometimes cannot be changed. But God offers genuine forgiveness and a break in the cycle, a new beginning.

"Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool." Isaiah 1:18.

Guilt can cause physical illness, depression, lack of faith (I John 3:21). It can cause people to punish themselves or to do good works to compensate. Good works can't erase guilt.

To deal with guilt:

1. Identify the cause. Sometimes we can be plagued by false guilt.
2. Realize that God's remedy for sin is complete (I John 1:9). To help stop the cycle of confessing the same sin over and over, begin to thank God for His forgiveness each time you fell guilty.
3. "As far as possible, experience the healing of all personal relationships."

My purpose in jotting down these notes is not to post "the answer" so that people don't have to buy the book: on the contrary, I hope anyone struggling with persistent sin will buy the book. There is so much more there that is so rich. Rather, this is just an exercise for me to review what I have read and studied.

Excess

I came across this verse while studying something else:

Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess. Matthew 23:25

One of the sins of the Pharisees was that they were "full of excess." How convicting to one with a lot of excess weight!

Yet it is helpful, too. One of my struggles is that, unlike a smoker or alcoholic, we can't just put away what we indulge in. We do have to eat. And it depresses me to think of never eating a cookie or burger again. But if I keep in mind that excessiveness, either of the amounts or the wrong types of foods, is the problem, I think that helps me get my mind around handling it.

How to say no, chapter 2

I want to continue to make notes for myself from How To Say No to a Stubborn Habit by Erwin Lutzer. This isn't meant to be a full outline -- just an exercise to help me learn and internalize the truths I have read. I'd highly recommend the book, retitled now Winning the Inner War.

Chapter 2 is "The Ground Rules." Dr. Lutzer assrts that before we can change, we must accept three principles:

1. God is good.

Satan's implication in the first temptation of Eve was that God was withholding something from her and therefore didn't have her best interests at heart. Dr. Lutzer then lists several examples of how temptations arise for us in the same way. The focus on what we can't have robs us of the blessing of all that we can. If we question whether God's way is the best, we won't be motivated to change.

We have to remember that "No matter how many pleasures Satan offers you, his ultimate intention is to ruin you." When we cling to our pleasures rather than God's will, we're not on;y displeasing God, we're destroying ourselves. I did a study on "my own way" from Scripture once and posted the results on my main blog here. I need to review that often when I am so tempted to cling to my own way and desires or when I think they are not so very bad.

On the other hand, Dr. Lutzer says, when we accept that God is good, we can more easily surrender to Him, knowing His way is perfect, and we're more willing to cooperate with Him.

2. We are fully responsible for our behavior.

Ever since Adam and Eve, people tend to place blame for their own actions on others, their circumstances, genes, even God. Though we may be affected by each of those, ultimately we are responsible for our choices. "Behavioral patterns are not caused by your circumstances but rather by your response to your circumstances."

Those this may be depressing to accept, "when you call something sin, there is the possibility of deliverance -- for Christ came to call sinners to repentance."

3. Deliverance is possible.

I Corinthians 10:13: There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

Hebrews 3:12: Take heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief, in departing from the living God.

more cat pictures

Learning...

Since I haven't seemed to be able to get myself mentally into what I need to do, I decided to pick up a book that had helped me before. How to Say No to a Stubborn Habit by Erwin Lutzer has been reworked into Winning the Inner War, but the older copy I have was published in 1994. I don't kow if anything else has changed in it besides the title. The subtitle to How to Say No to a Stubborn Habit is "When you really want to say yes." The book itself goes far beyond stubborn habits, though, and tells how to overcoming "besetting sins." My self-control in eating is just one area I struggle with, so I needed to visit this book again.

I don't know that I'll jot notes here from every chapter, but I thought by doing so here and there it will help me remember and incorporate what I have read.

The first chapter deals with the "whys" of temptation and the thought that we'd be able to avoid it so much better if God would keep Satan from us (or destroy him altogether), would take our passions from us, or would intervene to help us avoid those situations where we're more likely to fall. Occasionally He will intervene in those ways, but not usually. Lutzer gives just a few reasons for temptation:

1. A test of loyalty (i.e., Abraham and Isaac)
2. Development of our character

One point that especially struck me here: "Temptation brings the impurities to the surface." In other words, God is allowing us to see and experience an area that needs work.

3. To show God's grace and power, His strength in our weakness.

There are suggested actions at the end of each chapter, and one for this first chapter is to read and compare the temptation of Christ in Matthew 4:1-11 and that od the children of Israel when they were hungry in Exodus 6 and Numbers 11.

The next chapter is "The Ground Rules," and in skimming over it, one line I had underlined previously caught my eye:

"No matter how many pleasures Satan offers you, his ultimate intention is to ruin you."

How I need to remember that when I want to succumb to the pleasure of excess food. I tend to tell myself that one item is not sinful in itself or to downplay its negative effects, yet just by looking at me you can tell I have succumbed way too often. I can tell myself that that momentary pleasure is not worth the end results, yet I still find reasons to go ahead and enjoy. I am hoping to be able to change my mindset through this study.

Wednesday weigh-in

I hadn't been reporting for the weigh-ins at Tales From he Scales...because I hadn't really been doing anything, and it seemed useless to just post that I had a few pounds seesawing back and forth every week.

I had only lost 9 lbs. since the original challenge last May (my own fault), but at my last check I had gained it all back.

I weighed in for the first time in a long while this morning and was pleased that I was back down 7 lbs.

I still struggle with being motivated enough to do what I need to do to get the results I need, and with being willing to make the necessary changes. If I don't make changes in what I do, the weight isn't going to change (duh!)

So I guess I need to review my reasons for losing weight as well as the Scriptural focus. Somehow I need to find the motivation to get back on track.

I am sad to see Tales From the Scales coming to an end.